Online Marriage Counselling: Pros, Cons & Helpful Tips

In recent years, online marriage counselling (also known as online relationship or couples therapy) has become much more common, and like many people, I’ve been curious about how it compares to in-person sessions. There’s something that feels a bit strange about having such personal conversations through a screen. But there’s also something surprisingly intimate about it, too.

Being in your own space can help you feel more comfortable, and for some couples or polyamorous partners, that comfort makes it easier to open up. Whether you’re working through conflict, rebuilding trust, or simply trying to reconnect, online therapy can be a flexible and supportive way to do that.

New to couples therapy? Learn more in our Couples Therapy blog.

In Part One, we looked at what online marriage counselling is, and what to expect.

In Part Two, we’ll explore how to tell if online couples work is right for you, and I’ll share some practical tips to help you get the most out of your sessions.

Benefits of Online Relationship Counselling

1. Convenience and Accessibility

One of the biggest advantages of online therapy is its convenience. No need to factor in travel time, parking, or conflicting schedules. For couples juggling work, parenting, or even living in different locations, online sessions make it easier to prioritise your relationship without the logistical stress.

2. Comfort in Familiar Surroundings

Attending therapy from your own space can help you feel more at ease. Couples often find it easier to open up and engage in vulnerable conversations when they’re in a familiar, private setting—whether that’s the living room or a quiet corner of the home.

Being able to attend therapy from home can also feel more discreet, which can be ideal for those feeling hesitant or anxious about starting counselling.

3. Greater Choice and Flexibility

Online therapy removes geographic limitations. This allows you to choose a psychologist whose approach, experience, and personality align with your needs, even if they aren’t located nearby. Some psychologists also offer more flexible hours for online sessions, including evenings and weekends.

Downsides of Online Relationship Counselling

1. Technology Issues

Glitches, lagging video, or poor audio can interrupt the flow of a session and make an emotional connection harder. A stable internet connection and a backup plan (such as switching to a phone call) can help minimise disruptions.

2. Limited Privacy at Home

Not every home offers the privacy needed for open conversation. Concerns about children, housemates, or thin walls can affect how freely you speak. Planning ahead of your session (i.e. using headphones, white noise machines, or a private space like a parked car) can help create a more secure environment.

3. It Can Feel Less Personal

While many couples find online sessions equally or sometimes even easier to connect with their psychologist, some feel a sense of distance or disconnection. Body language is harder to read on-screen, and subtle emotional cues can be missed. For some, the in-person presence of a psychologist remains essential for building trust and rapport.

When Online Isn’t a Good Option

Online couples therapy is not suitable for all situations, especially where there is domestic or family violence, emotional abuse, or coercive control. In these cases, joint sessions (whether online or in person) may increase risk rather than offer support.

Safety must always come first. If you’re experiencing or are unsure about any form of abuse in your relationship, it’s essential to seek individual support and guidance from professionals trained in risk assessment and safety planning.

You’re not alone—confidential help is available. Reach out to trusted services such as:

• 1800Respect – 24/7 national support line: 1800 737 732

• Safe Steps (Victoria): 1800 015 188

• The Orange Door – for family violence support and connection to local services

5 Tips to Get the Most Out of Online Couples Therapy

1. Treat It Like an In-Person Appointment

Avoid multitasking or rushing in from another commitment. Find a quiet space, log in a few minutes early, and eliminate distractions so you can give the session your full attention.

2. Optimise Your Setup

Sit together, if possible, and use a reliable device with clear video and audio. Position the camera so your psychologist can see both of you well – this supports better communication and connection.

3. Create Transition Time

Unlike in-person therapy, virtual sessions can feel a little abrupt. Build in time before and after your session to ground yourselves—whether that’s a short walk, a cup of tea, 5-10 minutes to check in with each other, or a moment of silence. These rituals help process emotions and maintain connection.

4. Be Open with Your Psychologist

If something’s not working—technology, communication style, or pace—let your psychologist know. A good psychologist will welcome feedback and adjust to make the experience more effective for you both.

Interested in what makes a good psychologist? Check out our blog here. 

5. Strengthen Connection Between Sessions

Therapy is just one piece of the puzzle. Practice what you learn between sessions—through conversations, shared goals, or small acts of care. These moments reinforce your growth as a couple.

So is Online Relationship Therapy Right for You?

Every relationship is unique. Some couples and polyamorous relationships thrive in the flexibility and comfort of online therapy, while others prefer the closeness and presence of in-person sessions. Fortunately, many psychologists now offer hybrid options, so you do not need to pick just one way.

What matters most is that you’re taking steps to invest in your relationship. Whether you’re on a psychologist’s couch or your own, it’s the commitment to show up, reflect, and grow together that leads to meaningful change.

So, my final thoughts? If you’ve been on the fence about online couples counselling, why not give it a try? It can offer real connection and valuable insight, all from the comfort of your home. Our blog on when to seek relationship help may also support your decision-making process.

If you’re ready to move forward, we’re here to support you. Contact our warm admin team to schedule a session with one of our couples therapists at Peaceful Mind Psychology.

Want to Read More?

If you’re looking to deepen your understanding of relationships or explore tools outside of therapy, check out our blogs on rekindling the spark, navigating differences in sexual intimacy desires, and common communication pitfalls in relationships. Additionally, these trusted resources are also a great place to learn more:

• Esther Perel – Renowned psychotherapist and author, Esther explores the dynamics of modern relationships in her books (Mating in Captivity, The State of Affairs), her excellent podcast (Where Should We Begin?), and her website.

• Love Languages by Dr. Gary Chapman – A simple but powerful framework for understanding how you and your partner(s) give and receive love. You can complete their quiz and learn more here.

• Relationships Australia – Offers a wide range of support services, resources, and articles on communication, conflict, and relationship wellbeing.