Life Transitions: Staying Grounded When Life’s Up in the Air

It’s like the old saying says – the only constant in life is change. But even when it’s expected, change can shake us. Whether it’s a new job, the end of a relationship, becoming a parent, moving cities, or dealing with a health diagnosis, life transitions often leave us feeling like the rug’s been pulled out from under us. 

Some changes bring relief or excitement. Others bring loss and uncertainty. Many bring a mix of both.

As psychologists, we often meet people in the messy middle of change—when identity feels wobbly, the future is unclear, and emotions are all over the place. If you’re in that space right now, this post is for you. Let’s explore why transitions are so challenging, and how you can support yourself as you move through them.

Why Life Transitions Are So Disruptive

Brains like predictability. That’s why we thrive with a routine each week, our sleep is better with a stable bed time, and having a ritual to end the day helps us not take work home. Change challenges the predictability our brains rely on to feel safe. 

But it’s also not just the external circumstances that change—it’s your internal world, too. When a major part of your life shifts, it can affect your sense of self, purpose, and relationships. 

Even positive transitions (like graduating, starting a relationship, or retiring) can bring stress because they require us to let go of what was familiar.

Transitions often involve a “liminal” space—a time when the old is gone but the new hasn’t fully formed yet. It’s like being between trapezes: the safety of the last bar is gone, and you’re still reaching for the next, painfully aware of the space yawning beneath you. That in-between space can feel unsettling, but it’s also a place of enormous potential for growth and redefinition.

Emotional Responses Are Normal—Even the Messy Ones

There’s no single “right” way to feel during a life transition. Some people feel numb, others overwhelmed. Some bounce between excitement and grief. It’s all valid.

Give yourself permission to feel what you feel, without judgment. You might notice irritability, fatigue, sadness, anxiety, or even moments of unexpected joy. These emotional swings are your brain’s way of processing change. Suppressing them doesn’t help—but acknowledging and naming them can.

Try using a daily check-in: What am I feeling right now? What might that feeling be telling me? Is there anything I need in this moment to help with this feeling?

Identity Shifts Take Time

Transitions often bring up questions of identity. If you’re no longer a student, or a partner, or in the same role at work—who are you now? This can be particularly true for work or career changes, as our culture tends to put a lot of emphasis on our role as part of who we are. 

It’s common to feel a bit unanchored as you adjust to a new sense of self. Be patient. Identity doesn’t snap into place overnight. Instead of rushing to define yourself, try staying curious. What kind of person do you want to be in this new chapter? Are there any values that you’d like to try and embody right now? 

Journalling or talking things through with a trusted friend or psychologist can help reorient you. 

Coping With Uncertainty

Transitions are riddled with unknowns. It’s human nature to crave control and predictability, so it’s no wonder change often stirs up anxiety.

But not all uncertainty is bad—it’s also the space where creativity, insight, and growth can emerge. The key is learning how to sit with not-knowing without spiralling.

Focus on what is within your control: the small daily choices that support your wellbeing, the people you stay connected with, and the self-talk you practice.

Try this: when your thoughts run wild, ask yourself, What do I know for sure right now? What’s one small step I can take today?

Rebuilding Routines and Anchors

One of the most disorienting aspects of change is how it disrupts our daily patterns. Familiar routines act like psychological scaffolding—they provide structure, predictability, and comfort.

As soon as you’re able, begin building some structure back into your day. It doesn’t have to be perfect. Even something as simple as going for a daily walk, eating meals at the same time, or having a regular sleep schedule can act as major stabilisers.

If your world has changed significantly, it’s okay to go back to basics. Choose one or two grounding activities that give your day shape—and build from there.

Practical Tools for Navigating Life Transitions

If you’re wanting some concrete advice for navigating this period of change, here are some psychologist-approved strategies you can try:

1. Name the transition

Give yourself a clear internal story: “I’m going through a major change right now.” Acknowledging it helps legitimise your emotional response and reduces self-invalidation.

2. Create a “coping card”

List 5 things that have helped you through hard times before. Include people to reach out to, calming strategies, mantras, or other helpful reminders. Keep it somewhere you’ll see it. (Get some tips on making coping cards here!)

3. Practice self-compassion

Notice any self-criticism, and gently replace it with kindness. You don’t need to have it all figured out right now. You’re allowed to stumble.

4. Anchor in routine

Even small rituals help—making your morning coffee, stretching, going to bed at a regular time. These become grounding when everything else feels uncertain.

5. Avoid big decisions if possible

Give yourself time to adjust before making major life decisions. Transitions are already a lot—no need to pile on more unless it’s necessary.

6. Use reflective questions

Try journalling prompts like:

• What have I learned about myself during this time?
• What’s one thing I’m proud of this week?
• What do I want to carry forward from this transition?

Tip: If you’re wanting more suggestions, read our 5 Top Hacks for Stress Relief!

Change is Hard—But You’re Not Alone

If you’re navigating a life transition right now, know that it’s completely normal to feel out of sorts. You’re not broken. You’re adjusting. And while it may not feel like it yet, this chapter will eventually settle. With time, support, and care, you can emerge from it with a deeper understanding of yourself—and perhaps even a stronger sense of purpose.

If you’d like support along the way, our team is here to help. Life changes can be hard, but you don’t have to do them alone.